“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” (Jeremiah 33:3 NIV)
There are two things about decision-making that I dislike immensely: waiting to hear all the available choices, and then having to choose the “right” one. This has been especially true while applying to graduate school and waiting for an answer.
For those of you who know me, this whole process has been quite long. First it was medical school, then something in psych or teaching, and finally—after a long, hard look at what I think God might have planned—nursing school. And then it was choosing which schools to apply to, and now it’s waiting for and praying about admissions to accept.
Through it all, if I can be honest, it’s been tough going back to God over and over and asking what the next choice to make is. I’m terrified of choosing incorrectly. It’s hard for me to hear him at times. Decision-making is that point where I feel like a deer caught in headlights, not sure in which direction I should move. This is especially true when the choices I’ve been given all seem to be great! Those are times that I actually want doors to close, so that I can come upon a window and step through it, knowing that after praying over it, it was an “easy” decision. I just get so tired of asking, “Lord, is this the right way?”
But these are the times that God is pruning me and helping me to grow in a bold faith. What I should do, rather than stepping away from praying, is pray more! In John 15, Jesus calls us his friends (v. 15) and says that if we abide in him, our prayers will be answered (v. 7)—one way or another, but always in line with God’s will.
Rather than dread the decision-making process, I should embrace it as another opportunity to learn to hear from God, as a time that should build up my faith. Going to God time and time again, even if it’s with the same question, for me is an act of supplication. It would be so easy if God answered my prayers by closing all available doors except the right one, but how would that bring me closer to Him? Every opportunity to turn to Him I should embrace, no matter how many times or how long. He is faithful to answer.
Miel can be reached by email here.